The Purpose of Mortality

I gave a talk in my new ward yesterday. The topic was "the purpose of mortality." I researched and wrote a talk, and then Saturday afternoon realized it was all wrong. Sunday morning I read a talk by Richard G. Scott that had meant a lot to me at the time but I had not read in years, and realized this is what I needed to share instead, along with two specific stories.

After giving the talk I think it is a lot more profound than I realized as I truly had little to do with it. And I also really felt that I needed to share it. Hopefully it is of some use to someone.

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President Eyring said, "So, the great test of life is to see whether we will hearken to and obey God's commands in the mist of the storms of life.  It is not to endure storms, but to choose the right while they rage. And the tragedy of life is to fail in that test and so fail to qualify to return in glory to our heavenly home." 

This talk has really stuck with me because most of the time I see tragedies in life being when someone is sick or dies, but here President Eyring explains that if we are able to look at our mortality properly (with an eternal viewpoint), then we see that tragedies are really when people don’t choose God.  Particularly while the storms rage.

This reminds me of the book of Alma. Here the Nephites and Lamanites are in war for years and years (and chapters and chapters) and at the end some of them took this trial and it made them bitter and they turned away from God, and others were humbled by this trial and realized they had nowhere to turn but God. This seems to be the dividing point in mortality: which one will you choose.

Elder Scott said in April 2003 General Conference: “A fundamental purpose of earth life is personal growth and attainment.  Consequently, there must be times of trial and quandary to provide opportunity for that development.  His plan of happiness is conceived so that we will have challenges, even difficulties, where decisions of great importance must be made so that we can grow, develop, and succeed in this mortal probation.”

I spent my last semester as a BYU undergrad doing an internship in DC.  I hoped that my internship would turn in to full time employment and I could stay living in DC. My second week of my internship my dreams came to fruition and I was offered a job! After praying about taking the job I became confused for weeks…and eventually realized that I was experiencing a stupor of thought. So I asked the Lord what He would have me do instead, and I was told I needed to move back to Provo. And thus began a long trend in my life of whatever I mock eventually happening to me.

I returned to Provo to face a lot of criticism from some of my friends and family. They told me I shouldn’t have been so scared to leave Provo and that I should have taken that job. But I knew that I was where I was supposed to be and I knew that God knew it, and I could not deny it.  For months I applied for and was rejected by jobs. I was depressed and frustrated, but still knew that I was doing what I was supposed to do.  

Back to Elder Scott: “You can learn to use faith more effectively by applying this principle taught by Moroni: ‘Faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith.’  Thus, every time you try your faith, that is, act in worthiness on an impression, you will receive the confirming evidence of the Spirit. As you walk to the boundary of your understanding into the twilight of uncertainty, exercising faith, you will be led to find solutions you would not obtain otherwise.”

This scripture meant a lot to me during this time as I could not see why I needed to return to Provo. But I trusted God.

Of course, after four months of this I found a job. And that job was great and I loved it. But what is more meaningful to me about this time in my life is how, more than any other time in my life, I really came to know God. That as I look back over my mortality thus far, I see this as the pivotal moment when I gained depth of soul and a relationship with my maker.

Elder Scott says: “God uses your faith to mold your character.  Character is the manifestation of what you are becoming. Strong moral character results from consistent correct choices in the trials and testing of life.  Your faith can guide you to those correct choices.  Only enough guidance is given to lead you aright and not to weaken your growing character.”

One day during this experience I was tired of being so unhappy and decided to do something about it. I had the house to myself and played “Be Still My Soul” on repeat for six hours while reading my scriptures and praying. At the end of that time period I had the most distinct impression of my life. The Spirit said to me, “Rachel, these things that you think are ruining your life are making your life what it needs to become.” I of course at the time thought this meant I was being led to marriage or some exciting adventure. But I see now that this experience instead led me to being something worthwhile: a person of character.

A few years ago I had an idea (from the Spirit) that instead of wasting my money on beach vacations, I would save the money that I would have frivolously spent for the next few months and give it to my brother for Christmas as he was in need of a minivan. This became what I affectionately called “the minivan fund.”

A month after deciding to do this I found out my brother was having a baby. This would be his fourth child and they would officially outgrow their Saturn. I redoubled my efforts.

A couple of months later I found out my brother had cancer.  Many people reached out to me, asking how they could help. I told them about the minivan fund and people started adding money to it. During this time I had a dream that I threw a Christmas party, and at the party I was carrying around a bowl and people were putting cash in for the minivan. So I took this as a sign and threw a Christmas party, telling people about the minivan fund and leaving out the jars for donations. At the end of the night I had made $60…which was nice, but I had spent more than that on the party, so in reality it was a net loss for the minivan fund. I wondered why I had felt guided to throw the party.

The next day I went to church and a guy approached me and handed me a check for $500. After that I received checks from roommates and co-workers and parents of roommates. Every time someone gave me a check I would cry. One day my roommate handed me an envelope that some girl that I did not know had given her for the minivan fund. I was shocked when I opened it and saw a check for $3000.

In the end I was able to give my brother a check for $9000. It took me two hours on the phone to convince him to cash the check, even after explaining that the money was not mine and if I kept it I would just end up buying a massage chair.

Back to Elder Scott: “Why worry about future calamites or uncertainties over which you have no control? When challenges and testing do come, your faith will lead you to solutions. Your peace of mind, your assurance of answers to vexing problems, your ultimate joy depend upon your trust in Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ.”

What I like about the minivan fund story is that it did not solve their problems. My brother still had cancer and my sister-in-law was still six months pregnant with three crazy little boys and a sick husband. But that in the middle of this—in the rage of their storm when they could wonder why God had forsaken them—strangers had followed the prompting of the Spirit and in that helped my brother’s family see that God had not forgotten them. He was still there.

My sister-in-law even used this opportunity a year later to share the gospel on NPR. She called in and talked about the situation and how they felt they had been blessed because they had paid their tithing and fast offerings; that the Lord had provided for them in their time of need. My sister in law is a great example to me of choosing the Lord in times of trial.

Towards the end of the chemo, my sister in law wrote something on her blog that I want to share:

 “In the last few weeks, I have often been reminded of Elder Holland's talk on angels in conference:

“My beloved brothers and sisters, I testify of angels, both the heavenly and the mortal kind. In doing so I am testifying that God never leaves us alone, never leaves us unaided in the challenges that we face. “[N]or will he, so long as time shall last, or the earth shall stand, or there shall be one man [or woman or child] upon the face thereof to be saved.” On occasions, global or personal, we may feel we are distanced from God, shut out from heaven, lost, alone in dark and dreary places. Often enough that distress can be of our own making, but even then the Father of us all is watching and assisting. And always there are those angels who come and go all around us, seen and unseen, known and unknown, mortal and immortal.

“I love this idea, and I loved it when I first heard this talk, but I can now also bear testimony that it is true. We have been helped by angels from God-- there is no other explanation.”

I am often wowed by how any experience for any length of time—even for our entire life—is worth it if through it we come to know God. Through my trials I have come to know God. And I am ever grateful for the enabling power of the Atonement through which I can overcome any trial because I have God on my side.