monkey arms

When I was 16 I was stuck in a very long line for Splash Mountain at DisneyWorld with brother Russell. While bored in line we compared arm lengths and discovered, surprisingly, that my arms were longer than his. And he had the same length arms as James who is 6'3".

That is when I knew. And then Russell asked me if I could jump rope with my arms. Years later Russell pointed out my monkey arms in a video of mine and that led to my recognizing my incredible ability to do a monkey impression, and later my friend blogging that I pulled off "the best animal impression of his life."

When I was 18 I was at a mall in Provo with my bff Chad. He was buying a dress shirt and the lady at Macy's measured his arms. He asked her to measure my arms and she emphatically said multiple times "there is no way her arms are longer than yours." Then she finally acquiesced and my arms were an inch longer than Chad's.

That summer I worked as a waitress and more than once a random customer would say "go go gadget arms" when I reached across the table and successfully filled their glasses with water.

In college I realized that I could catch any bouquet at weddings. I gave up shortly thereafter, but was convinced to come out of retirement at Bethany's wedding. Check out that reach.



My arms are proportionate to my feet. Which led to my receiving some random postcard from Nordstrom last week inviting me to a large shoe sale. HOW DID NORDSTROM KNOW MY ADDRESS AND SHOE SIZE?? That is really, really weird.

Bless long arms that allow me to always reach things in high shelves and unlock every door in my car that does not have automatic locks. I just have to avoid long sleeved shirts.